24 down, 16 to go!

The title says 16 weeks left, but I would be fine with 14. This pregnancy is much harder than I imagined it would be. For some reason, it takes more effort to grow two babies! Go figure.  I have the same amount of energy as a 90 year old woman.  I posted on a twins/multiples forum asking if it was normal to run out of steam so quickly. Quite a few twin mommies agreed that once they hit around the 20 week mark their energy plummeted.

But I can't complain. Heartburn and swelling have yet to make their appearance! Both of those reared their ugly heads while I was pregnant with Easton. And when I say swelling, I mean like gross swelling. My feet looked like they could pop if poked with a sharp object. I'm hoping that I won't swell so bad this pregnancy... I'll be big enough without the extra water weight! Although if I do swell, I can get out of work quicker... hmmmmm. That wouldn't be the end of the world.

 Here are the rest of my pregnancy stats as of today:

How far along? 24 Weeks exactly
How big are the twins? The size of cantaloupes (yes, cantaloupes... and there are TWO of them in there). Almost a foot long, about a pound and a half in weight. They were both 1lb, 2 oz at my ultrasound last week.
Total weight gain/loss? Ugh... 
Maternity clothes? Pretty much exclusively. I hear midriff isn't cool anymore. 
Sleep? Still sleeping great! 
Best moment this week? Laughing with Jer this morning as the little guys put on a show in my belly
Symptoms? Exhaustion. Some mood swings. 
Food cravings? Turkey Subs. 
Food aversions? None... I want to eat everything. All the time.
Labor signs? Nope, not yet.
Belly button in or out? It's pretty much flat. Fingers crossed it stays that way!
What I miss? Energy... Motivation...
What I'm looking forward to? Washing baby clothes and putting them away!
Bump?  Here are the latest pics. Easton wanted to help.

Far better things ahead...

I started this blog to journal my feelings as I go through this pregnancy and the wonderful things that come with being someone's Momma.  It's funny to go back and look at my thoughts and all the random things that get written down here. Sometimes life can be so stinking amazing and you just want to soak it in and remember it.

For instance, today I got to sleep in a little bit and enjoy my morning (mostly decaf) coffee with my adorable son riding in the backseat to grandma's house. I stopped to get a delicious bagel with a gift card I won over the weekend and came to work. I texted my mom and mentioned how tired I was feeling today and she shows up at my work an hour later with a yogurt parfait and a pint of cookie dough ice cream. As if that wasn't enough, I went to see Easton on my lunch and he actually laid down and snuggled with me on the couch for my entire break. The flowers are starting to bloom, the air is warm today, and I happened to have Peach Snapple in my van. There's two precious babies in my belly growing, kicking, and making me more excited day by day.  Life is wonderful!

I told myself yesterday that I was not going to be upset today. There are SO many amazing things going on in my life. But today was supposed to be my due date. The baby I lost in September would have been full term today. Now I'm not looking for sympathy or for anyone to feel bad for me. Yes, miscarriage is a horrible thing to go through.  I did cry today. My heart loves that baby as much as the son I saw on lunch break and the two sons I'm carrying. So yes, it's perfectly acceptable for me to be emotional today and remember that baby.

But today I don't have a void. There is no hole left where that baby was. Do I wish I could have met that baby? Of course. I know I will someday. But did God heap blessings on top of my family's life after losing that baby? Absolutely. In fact, today I'm struggling with the thought, If I could still be pregnant with that baby, would I change what happened? Back in September, I would have done anything to keep that baby. Today I look at where I've come since then, where I'm going from here and I can't help but think that God's plan was perfect. It was painful, it was heart-breaking. No one wants to go through that. I am for sure not saying that I am glad it happened. It sucked. But if there is one thing that I know for sure, it is that God's hand was in every step of this journey, writing our story the way He saw fit. I believe that because we chose to praise and trust Him through our darkest days, He blessed us with days more bright than we ever imagined. And it's my responsibility to give Him all the credit.

I don't deserve it. I have a rotten attitude sometimes. I judge people too quickly. I'm definitely not in the running for wife of the year. I don't have enough patience with my son. I whine about stupid stuff. I can be an absolute jerk. I get angry. I am selfish. I don't have much compassion. I question God. I could go on... but you get the picture. I'm a hot mess like everybody else. I don't know why God chose to bless me so much. I don't know why He gave me a husband and a son that are pretty much perfect. I don't know why He let me get pregnant again so quickly, and with twins! I don't know why He gave me the perfect life that I get to live.  I'm no preacher, I don't speak or write eloquently. I've typed and erased the end of this paragraph fifteen times.  I have no answers, other than that God is good. I am so grateful that He allows me to look back and see His plan at work.

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:18-19

Baby Names!

I bet you were hoping that we would reveal the baby names today. Sorry, not yet!

Ok, so before you get mad at my ploy to make you click on my blog, picking out baby names for two babies is very hard. Especially when you are indecisive like me and my indecisivity (yeah, it's a word...) multiplies when I'm pregnant. Oh duh, indecisiveness... there is a word for that. Oh well, I like mine better. Moving on... here's my short list of must-haves for baby names:

• Both names have to sound good with Hill 
• Both names have to sound good together, but not too matchy-matchy
• The names have to be as awesome as Easton
• The names can't have ridiculous spelling in an effort to be trendy or whatever
• They can't be hard to pronounce
• They can't be in the top ten names of the year, or the top ten hipster names of the year.
• My family and my in-laws can't have any reasonable objections to the names... I'm a people pleaser, I can't help it.
• and the HARDEST ONE: Jeremy has to agree. 

I love him to death but him and I hardly ever agree on names. When we found out Easton was a boy, we decided on Easton that same day. With the twins, it has been months of vetos, rolling eyes, and "no-freakin'-way!"s. Every time I bring it up, he changes the subject. Every time he gives me a name, I laugh at him. Also, he picks on my for my flaky-ness but he's just as bad. I could have begged and begged to use a certain name but he'll say no until someone else brings it up a month later. Then all of the sudden he loves it. One word: flaky. 

So long story short, after 69 days of knowing their gender, we have kind of decided on first names! 

BUUUTTTT, in an effort to keep you interested/annoyed for a while, we're going to hold off on revealing them. However, the polls on the right side of the blog (if you're using the web version) may possibly contain those names. I'm curious to see your opinions, though, so please vote! Polls are open all weekend and I may or may not post the actual names on Monday. We'll see :)

Happy Friday!